The meditation group I belong to teaches us about life’s sanskara, or the stuff that keeps coming up throughout our lives that must be dealt with. For example, suppose you keep meeting the same type of person as you’re dating. No matter how far outside your comfort zone you look, that new person soon starts acting like or resembling in some way your former dating mishaps. Or suppose you have long felt harassed by your aunt, who has a sharp tongue and doesn’t mind belittling you in front of anyone within earshot. Or maybe you have a tendency to hire shady contractors. It’s all sanskara, which means these situations are probably going to continue presenting themselves in your life until you find the strength or the patience to finally deal with them effectively.
In your working relationships, you’re going to see them. It’s the stuff that keeps recurring in your client base. For example, mine is the recurrence of clients who bring in posses to edit what I’ve already edited. Or it’s the return of clients who are unorganized and want it yesterday. In my personal relationships, I’ve come across so many self-centered, arrogant people that I’m sure it’s my sanskara to learn to accept them and look to their more endearing qualities instead of focusing on how I want to shake them and scream “You’re not that special!” It isn’t that these people are any more flawed than we are – it’s that maybe we have perceptions of how they are based on how they affect our perceptions of ourselves.
According to Hindu principles, this stuff, the chum that’s churned up in your life, is going to keep recurring until you figure out a way to deal with it internally. In fact, even then the issue(s) may never fully leave you. It’s there to strengthen your conscience, bring some clarity to your awareness, and help you gain insight into your self. If you continue to allow the stuff to cause turmoil, it’s just going to keep coming up. That’s not a bad thing – it’s a lesson waiting to be learned. So it goes with client sanskara.
What’s your sanskara with clients? What client issues keep recurring in your career? How have you dealt with it in the past? What can you do to deal with it in the future? What do you need to do in order to let go of the frustration and move to a more controlled, professional place when these people waltz into your work day?
I’ve always been very aware of and diligent about the sanskara in my personal life, but I hadn’t ever thought about it running through my professional life. Hmmm.
I think I get recurring clients who have no problem recognizing my valuable experience as a professional writer and also my professionalism in general, but often times I don’t receive the same professionalism in return from them. I always aim to take the high road in all aspects of my life, but I find that sometimes this means leaving the unpleasantries unsaid and not getting into the nitty gritty of you-said-I-said, which can actually lead to miscommunications and absence of importance information. I need to strike a balance between when to hold my tongue and when to release it.
Excellent post, Lori, you’ve given me lots to think about. Thanks!
Sanskara. I’m familiar with the principle, but this is the first time I’ve heard the word. I like it! I suppose mine is learning to handle adversity with grace—both personally and professionally.