We’re flying home tomorrow. I’ll bore you with stories, I’m sure. But I’m about to re-enter the workload. And as I’m writing this, prior to our trip, I’m certain I’ll forget something.
I tried to get it all done before we left, but plans got in the way. Not mine, mind you. Theirs. Everyone who has ever worked from home knows what’s coming when there are two or more people in the house: those requests.
Last week was no exception. One here is without a car, the other without a license, and another working hours not conducive to appointments and shopping. But hey, I’m free, right?
Wrong.
The day before we left I had to:
- Meet someone at the train.
- Run to the bank (for myself).
- Run to get supplies at the hardware store (mentioned to me AFTER the bank trip).
- Rent a car for the trip (I volunteered – sometimes it’s just easier).
- Help plan our post-wedding trip (can’t we just wing it? Please?).
- Field a phone call from a relative.
- Help someone find a missing book.
- Work.
That last one seemed low on everyone’s priority list but mine. So I did what any savvy freelancer should do:
I said no to a few things.
They think it’s my being mean, selfish, whatever. I know it’s my being protective of the little time I have to work in a day. The minute they get home, my work day is done. I don’t care if I’m not finished. The interruptions, noise, new dynamics in the house make it hard, if not impossible, to get anything done. I have to refuse requests for a few reasons:
To establish precedent. You think you can say no to them after you’ve already hauled them around town for three weeks? Go on, try it. Let me know how that works. Instead, accept with a huge caveat: “Just this once during my work day” or just say no from the start. You have to set boundaries if you expect them to respect your space.
To protect my time. I work typical weekday hours so I can spend time with them when they’re home. If they want to see me, they have to let me have my work time. Period.
To curb resentment. I do get resentful when the requests come in during a work day. I admit to it, and I voice it openly. If they think twice about asking, good. I’ve made my point and avoided any need to please at my own expense. Sure, they get upset. They also get over it. I’ve often pointed to any one of them and said, “How about you pick me up during your work day?” That gets the point across, too, because one request is fine, but five requests later, it’s not so fine anymore. For anyone.
How do you protect your time?
The phone is turned off 90% of the time.
If you interrupt me, I will bite your head off.
I say "no" — A LOT.
and I'm flexible, I don't do the 9-5 thing.
Anyone who stays at the house knows my prime writing time is before 10 AM, so tiptoe!!!